ADD teeth

Although I don't post a lot, I think about it often.

Especially in the car on the way to work.  I write great articles!  But by the time I get there, the moment is lost, and I never actually write them down...

Also when I get to work I usually get stuck into working, and I don't get sidetracked since I started taking the long acting medication.  I take it before I walk out the door in the morning, and it kicks in just before I get to work, and I am good for the rest of the work day.  Even after it has worn off, if I am absorbed in my task at 430 when technically the medication is starting to no longer have an effect, I can roll on with the concentration for another couple hours because I am already in 'the zone'.

Anyway, that's not what this is about.  Preamble over.

Today I am talking about.... TEETH!!

And potential side-effects of medication taking.

You've maybe heard of meth-mouth?  If not before maybe you looked it up after watching Orange is the New Black, as explanation as to why Pensatucky's teeth are so bad.  In actual fact, taking meth does not effect teeth directly, but rather the drug takers lifestyle of not brushing teeth is more the problem.  Although drugs like meth and speed can also cause *teeth grinding and jaw clenching, which would also have an effect.

There have been links to ADD and teeth problems and it's a two-fold cause:

*  People with ADD suffer from anxiety, and often involuntarily grind and clench their teeth[1].

* ADD medications can cause jaw clenching and teeth grinding as a side effect. [I have no official source for this without searching more, but people on ADD/ADHD forums report this frequently.  And also I'm telling you it's totally a thing.]

My point?

My tooth exploded yesterday!  Well ok, the side came off. I have perfect teeth.  I don't eat a lot of sugar, and I have only ever had one filling.  Yesterday I was enjoying my steak dinner when suddenly I was crunching on a bone bit, then I realised when my mouth felt funny, I was crunching on my own tooth!  It's pretty scary, having part of your tooth fall out for no reason.

I went to the dentist today and he filled the hole with the white stuff, it was a pretty fast and cheap procedure, no injections or anything.

Dentist didn't really have any explanation for why this could have happened except for that's where my bite puts the pressure.  I know though.  I clench my teeth a lot.  Especially when I have finished work, but my medication hasn't worm off yet, like driving home from work.  Some days I grind the crap out of them.

I really like my perfect teeth and it scares me that something might compromise them.  But at the same time I can't do my job without the medication, I'd need to find a new career.  Not to mention living my life, forgetting work, paying bills, washing clothes, etc.  So for now, I'm hoping this is an isolated incident, and I'm going to try hard not to clench my teeth in the future, because it turns out eventually they crack!

It's always just when you think you are getting ahead these things happen eh?  Last week I had $1500 in my savings account, this week I paid my rego, got my electricity bill, broke a tooth, then broke my phone (another story!) and plummeted to a $0 bank balance in less than 24 hours!

Tooth and I are doing well, though.  Looking forward to chomping another steak in the near future.

1. http://www.everydayhealth.com/adhd/tooth-grinding-poor-memory-and-more-surprising-facts-about-adhd.aspx

* The teeth grinding at night thing is called Bruxism.  Experts believe it's caused by a slow-moving brainwave, but I feel like it's probably the stress of feeling like you are letting people down all the time... (no scientific source, just my opinion!)

Evenings

Took my medication after work like I am supposed to.

Don't think I've gotten more done, but I did eat less dinner.  Maybe if nothing else I'll loose some weight.

I went to the gym after work when my 3 o'clock medication was probably wearing off, then took another one after that.  That seemed to work ok.

Medication

So after my pessimism last time, then I got to go pick up my script I was able to get it filled at the pharmacy immediately, no "I'm sorry we have to order that in we don't keep it in stock" from them for a change.. The pharmacy lady is also really nice, and keeps my script there for me (even though it's not a legal requirement in this state) and fills the script on the spot no wait. What tapes most places so long? Get the box, put the sticker on it. Seriously how can that take 15 minutes? She also writes the date of the box when the timer resets and I can pick up another script. Not that that'd much of a problem, I have been picking them up late because I have not been taking enough medication.
I saw the Dr today and I had to admit I have not been taking the medication like I am supposed to be. I also said, "I honestly can't tell you why I haven't been doing it." He said a lot of people have concerns about not 'being themselves' and what-not, and also becoming accustomed to the medication and needing to take more and more, which isn't actually a thing. I don't think either or those are my problem. I think it's 50% the feeling that I don't want to have to take mediation every day, and I want to just get into the habit of living a productive life by myself (which may never happen) and part the feeling that I need to hoard the medication, so if I don't need it 100% I'd rather save it than waste it. This is probably caused by the times I have moved and had to wait months to see a new doctor and run out, and also the times I forgot to pick up scripts, and they expired and I run out, and then when I really needed it I wasn't able to get any.
I find myself thinking a lot, will I need it for what I have to do this afternoon?
I'm not supposed to do that though, I'm supposed to take the same amount every day no matter what. And I don't even know if that's the best way or not, because I haven't been doing it.
So from now on, I will.
It's a bit weird, fitting in after work exercise. I don't like to do cardio before it has worn off, it makes my heart pound. This Dr didn't seem to think that'd be a problem, but the last one did. So I'm going with my instinct. But I should take another one after gym/run. And to be honest, while I am doing well at work my home is going to shit, I never have any clean clothes, i don't get anything done of an evening.
I also think I should take it earlier, like when I first wake up. I might get out of the house in a more timely fashion, instead of walking around in circles for 15 minutes not being sure what I am looking for.
I asked to switch to the long acting. I sometimes get swept along to meetings and don't get out for two hours and my medication wears off. Plus I sit in that awful spot in the office where everyone can see what you are doing when they walk past. It's weird rummaging through my bag for pills all the time. It costs more because it's not on the PBS list, but well, it'll be better. I just paid $280 to see the Dr so whatever, in debt forever I guess. I don't even want to talk about my money problems!

waiting

Ok, so two weeks after appointment, still waiting to hear back about getting a prescription. I got told on the day (Wednesday) that I might hear something over the next couple days, and if not to call on Monday. Thursday, Friday, I hear nothing. Monday, I don’t call, still waiting. Tuesday I call, leave a message. Wednesday I call again, reception guy tell me yes he got my message yesterday and passed it on. Ok, great. Back to waiting I guess. Another week passes… Wednesday again I call, and this time I get told that the approval has been sent, or requested, or something. So that’s good news I guess. Things are happening. No idea when I might actually be able to come in and pick up a script. I don’t want to hassle them, but I’d like to know what’s going on. I want to seem proactive, not like a junkie, gimme my drugs man! I’ve been asked to take on a new role at work, on a temporary basis. It’s a really good opportunity to prove myself, and learn some new skills and show them what I can be capable of. But I’ll need to be at my best to do well. Not disorganised and scruffy and underslept. I’ll need to be as productive as possible. I don’t want all this red tape standing in the way of that. I hope they call me back soon, because you know what will happen next? I’ll get to the pharmacy and they’ll say, oh, we don’t keep that in stock… and then I’ll have to wait another week. Ten bucks says that’s what happens.

Finally saw the Dr

So… Good news, doctor is not useless. It’s pretty hard to become a psychiatrist I guess, the idiots would get weeded out. I’m always paranoid, what do they know? What if they are wrong? Dr has a beard, feel slightly reassured. So judgey. Did the initial consultation thing, talked about school, family, medical history. Discussed future strategies. I was stressing out a lot because I had forgotten that the opinions of nutters on the internet and the opinions of medical professionals are a completely different thing. Just because there are people online (and in real life) who have no idea what they are talking about saying “OMG drugs are bad!” doesn’t mean that any doctors actually think that way. I’m pleased to realise that once again, anyone with half a brain realises that if something helps, it’s a good thing. So discussed medication with Dr, explained when it helped, when it didn’t. He thinks taking it will be the best thing. I’m relived because I know that I cannot do this job without it. I get a lot more work done on days when I take the medication. Since I had about 2 weeks worth and three months to wait for the appointment, I’ve been rationing it out and trying to work out what days might be more important than others to get more done, or which tasks are more important to do in a timely fashion. It’s been pretty stressful. I also have things that have been neglected at home, washing, cleaning, TAXES! (I’m only 4 years behind…) Slight setback, in this state you need approval before a script can be printed out. Which takes a few days. Weird! What if it get’s denied? It is technically possible, but unlikely in my case. Here you need two opinions as well. Which means possibly having to pay (and wait) to see a second Dr, to agree with the first one. As I had a piece of paper in my possession listing my previous Doctor’s name and the medication he prescribed, that should count. It was just luck that I found that when I was moving, and put in it the ‘psych’ section of my file. And more luck again that I happened to take it with me. It was actually given to me to keep in the car, in case I got given a random drug test and got a reading. So hopefully they call me in a few days and I can go in and pick up a script. Then try this new dosage at my new job and see what happens. I hope I don’t have to see a second Dr, my old one retired, so it’s going to be hard to get evidence out of him! Though we may be able to contact the old clinic and I give permission for records to be sent over. Well, I’ll cross that bridge if I come to it. For now, feeling relief!

Appointment today

I’ve been really nervous about this appointment for about, well three months now I guess! I’m really worried they are going to tell me I can’t have any medication, to suck it up and start making lists or something. I’ve heard there is a reluctance to prescribe meds from doctors in this town. I don’t know what I’d do in that situation, wait three months and pay another $500 for an appointment in the city? No point dwelling on it I suppose I’ll find out soon enough… I have medication left over and have been taking it at work on some days and not on others. I want to get to a stage when I don’t have to take it anymore, but for now it really does make a big difference. I don’t want to get paid to sit here and do nothing, I want to be a productive and valuable staff member. The medication helps me get more work done. I’m worried I’ll have to work hard to convince new Dr of that. Ultimately these have the professional opinion but I know what works for me and what doesn’t.

Do you have an ongoing disability?

When I was attending a work training thing, we had to fill out a lot of forms so that the training is paid for. When I got the ‘do you have a disability’ question, my pen hovered between the yes and no box, before eventually I decided to go for the NO option. Later when we were discussion diversity in the workforce at another training day, the trainer mentioned that a lot of people with disabilities tick the no box, and they didn’t understand why. Why not declare it if it means that you can get assistance for anything that might affect your work? Well there are several reasons why I usually select no, when technically I could choose yes. First of all, what is a disability? Legally, ADD is a disability. But then I think, what about the people with more real disabilities, being unable to walk, or see, or hear? I’m much better off than them, do I deserve to be in the same category? Does it affect my work? Well, yes… but can they do much about it? Not really, other than understanding there is a reason. It’s not like they can order me a special keyboard. Do I want them to know? This is the real issue, and the answer is, no, not unless it will prevent me for getting fired for not working well enough. At uni I did declare myself to disability services, because I started doing badly and I was worried about being kicked out. My doctor thought it was a good idea when I brought it up and said, “of course! Why haven’t you done this already? If there is help for you, take it!” It was possible for me to be able to contact disability services if I felt like I needed an extension, or more time for exams but I never did any of that. I don’t feel like I needed special treatment. If I never got an assignment in on time for my entire academic career, that’s my problem and I should try harder. (For the record, I handed a few thing in on time in third year!) I never really had much contact with disability services after registering and the initial interview, but it was good to know that I could have made an appointment if I needed to. After switching to part time uni was much easier to manage. I did receive three academic warnings and when the disciplinary committee contacted me for an interview I said sorry I was overseas, but if you want to hear about how I am trying to do better you have my permission to talk to disability services about my situation, and that’s the last I ever heard from them. I don’t know if that made them leave me alone, or if they had worse cases to deal with and I was not worth worrying about. Either way, I never got put on probation or restriction, just received a few warnings. So the situation at hand. I am filling out a staff survey. In this instance, they have given me some guidelines. 2 For the purpose of this survey, a person has a disability if they report that they have a limitation, restriction or impairment, which has lasted, or is likely to last, for at least 6 months and restricts everyday activities. This includes: • loss of sight (not corrected by glasses or contact lenses) • loss of hearing where communication is restricted, or an aid to assist with, or substitute for, hearing is used • speech difficulties • shortness of breath or breathing difficulties causing restriction • chronic or recurrent pain or discomfort causing restriction • blackouts, fits, or loss of consciousness • difficulty learning or understanding • incomplete use of arms or fingers • difficulty gripping or holding things • incomplete use of feet or legs • nervous or emotional condition causing restriction • restriction in physical activities or in doing physical work • disfigurement or deformity • mental illness or condition requiring help or supervision • long-term effects of head injury, stroke or other brain damage causing restriction • receiving treatment or medication for any other long-term conditions or ailments and still restricted • any other long-term conditions resulting in a restriction. So that’s a NO from me then. Sometimes, it’s more of a grey area. Whether there comes a time in the future where I will need to tell my manager, remains to be seen. Hopefully after my appointment next month I’ll work out a good pattern of medication and discipline and no one will need ever now because I’ll be as productive and useful as the next person!